Plant thieves are pond scum

What do you see when you look at the photo below?


If, maybe after scratching your head, you say “nothing,” you would be right. There’s nothing there—not anymore.

Continuing our little game, what do you see in the next photo, top center?


Did you say “a hole?” You’re right. A hole, partially in shadow.

Here’s a wider view:


You see the pattern, right? Both spots are empty.

But they weren’t, as recently as a few days ago.

The first spot had been occupied by this small agave:


It was a hybrid by Jeremy Spaeth (Hidden Agave) called Agave ‘Ovaticata’, a cross between Agave ovatifolia and Agave parryi var. truncata. It wasn’t large (yet), but I loved its wide blue leaves and red spines and teeth:


The second spot had been occupied by another rare agave hybrid, Agave ‘Sea Star’, a variegated cross between Agave ovatifolia and Agave parrasana. This is the only photo I ever took of it, and it isn’t even a particular good picture:


Both agaves are gone. I discovered their absence yesterday. I didn’t remove them, my wife didn’t remove them, and our dog Stella most certainly didn’t even though Stella is a master digger and it would have been easy for her to excavate them.

So who took them? Pond scum with a shovel. The kind of person that makes good people like me loose faith in humanity.

Yesterday, when I discovered the theft, I was mad as a three-legged dog trying to bury a turd on an icy pond. Today, I feel deflated and sad. My bubble of safety has burst, and I’ll have to rethink any future plantings along the sidewalk. Maybe I’ll put my potted prickly pears and chollas in the ground and make a cactus fence.

The immediate solution is to install a wide-angle security camera that will monitor this area 24/7. I never wanted to go that far, but the time has come.

P.S. This doesn’t feel like random, casual theft. I seems targeted, like the person knew what they wanted. That makes it even worse because it makes it a premeditated crime.



© Gerhard Bock, 2023. All rights reserved. To receive all new posts by email, please subscribe here.

Comments

  1. Oh Gerhard, I am so sorry. What a blow. I hope you don't lose faith in the 97% of good people but also that you plant the spikiest, most painful plants in their stead.

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    1. No worries, I've met too many good plant people to ever lose my faith in us as a community.

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  2. As I was reading I was thinking "this person knew what they were stealing" it wasn't just "oh pretty plant, I want!". I am so sorry. I know this feeling, having had someone walk all the way to the end of our driveway and take a hanging container with a small agave in it. This is also why I've never opened my garden for the HPSO, not because a member would do this, but because anyone passing by could wander in that day (there's no ID checking) shop the back garden containers, and come back at a later time. So your thoughts on installing a camera... I don't know how much of a deterrent that would be. Unless Davis is A LOT different than Portland. I see neighborhood posts daily with camera footage of thieves at work, it doesn't seem to stop them.

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    1. I'm taking these types of concerns much more seriously now. It sucks, because it makes me a more jaded person than I want to be.

      I'm hoping the presences of a security camera with a bright light (motion-activated) will deter any future thefts.

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  3. Cameras are nice but they really don't do much other than let you see who took them and that's usually where it ends. I plan on planting up in front of my fence but it will be generic stuff like crassulas, portulacarias, pedilanthus macrocarpus and easy to get landscape aloes. All my valuables are inside my fence. I think someone saw what you planted out there on your blog which is truly (excuse my language) shitty. A nice wall of spine killing chollas and prickly pear might just be the answer for you. Argh... this angers me to no end as well...

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    1. I've heard of plant thefts in the Bay Area, but never here in our small town. The time to feel safe is over. That makes me really sad.

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  4. Pond scum is far too nice a term. I’m so sorry it’s come to the point of security camera shopping. As Tamara said, when you go to replace them, plant the nastiest, spiniest, meanest (and cheapest!) cacti you can find for those lowlifes.

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    1. Nasty cacti can actually be quite attractive. I suspect whoever was after my agaves wouldn't go near a cholla! Of course I wouldn't either :-)

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  5. So sorry to hear that. It’s really unfathomable. They should have learned those lessons as toddlers.

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    1. I have a feeling people who do this have other personality flaws as well!

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  6. That just stinks! How rude and rather forward of the thief. Is there any possibility that it is an animal? When we first moved here, many plants I put in the ground were 'dug' up and taken. Later I found said plants a little way down the shoreline, half eaten. I think the deer were eating them and since they were newly planted, the roots didn't hold them in the soil.

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    1. I don't think it could have been an animals. One agave was too large. Plus, this feels targeted, as in they knew exactly what they wanted.

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  7. My repertoire of vulgar terms doesn't even cover the lowlife who did this. Hope you're somehow able to replace your babies and give them a new spot inside the fence.

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    1. The problem is that this bed, along the public sidewalk, gets more sun than any spot in our backyard. That makes it prime real estate for sun-loving succulents. Plus, the neighborhood does enjoy our plants.

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  8. It seems the only answer to Janet's question would be some video footage.. Even if a camera does not lead to an exact identification or charges being pressed, at least there would be no mystery as to how they disappeared. As an avid admirer of your blog and plant collection, this post chips away at my heart. What goes around will come back around.

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    1. I hope it wasn't anybody I know. That would simply be too crushing.

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  9. Ugh, thieves are such low-lifes! I'm sorry this happened to you and your garden, Gerhard.

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    1. Thank you, Pam! Does stuff like that happen in Austin, too?

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    2. I have heard of a few instances on my neighborhood FB page - planters stolen off porches and mailboxes. And years ago a thief or thieves targeted a well-known garden right after the house had been sold. Someone clearly knew what was there and cherry-picked. Ugh.

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    3. I keep wondering if there's anything we can do to prevent this from happening, but the answer is probably no.

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  10. Oh gosh, that is sad. That would make me angry, too. I hope you find out who took them and/or you find a solution to prevent it from happening again. The only thieves who've stolen plants from my garden have been rabbits...and they've "stolen" plenty! Argh. (Obviously, this was a person, which is even more maddening.)

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    1. I've had rats chew plants to the ground and our dog playfully dig up some echeverias (without damaging them). This is different. Even the plant tags were taken!

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  11. Ugh! I'm so sorry you got hit by a thief; it does seem planned, considering the specific plants that were taken. I have an Agave 'Sea Star' and detached pups last year that are doing very well. I would be happy to mail you one if you want a (small) replacement.

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    1. You're so kind! Thank you for your offer. I do have pups--as you said, 'Sea Star' offsetsgenerously.

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  12. I'm so sorry this happened to you. Such a violation.

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  13. This is just about as crappy as it gets. I would probably spend hours pondering what the profile of the perpetrator is. Would a collector steal from another collector ? Was it a student trying to sell rare plants raise funds to pay off the college debt ? It has to be either a money thing or a 'I must have this plant' thing. Either way I am so sorry you were victimized like this. I hope your security camera puts an end to it , but it sucks to have to live like that.

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    1. I've done just that, trying to figure out who might do that. I think collectors with obsessive tendencies *would* steal from other collectors if the temptation is strong enough. I don't have proof, but it seems like they knew what they wanted, as opposed to a random crime of opportunity.

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  14. I'm sorry, Gerhard. I know the joy and pride you have in your collection and the value you put on the plants given to you by the many friends you've made within your ever growing plant community. I'd put in lots of chollos and prickly pears too - as well as security cameras. I hear that motion-activated spray systems deter rabbits and raccoons so maybe throwing in one or two of those would be helpful (Maybe you can use a stink spray instead of water.)

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    1. Your comment made me laugh--I was envisioning a motion-activated sprayer spewing coyote urine, which apparently is very smelly (you can buy it on Amazon as a deer deterrent). Of course, *I* would probably be the first person to get sprayed.

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  15. So sorry to hear about the agaves - that sucks. Consider that it may not be a human that pilfered it. I know in my yard I’ve seen where critters have dug up and moved a small agave, which I’ve found elsewhere. Being smallish and newly planted they can be pretty easy to get out. I’ve also found a pine cone buried in a pot - which had to come from 25+ yards away. In my case I suspect it’s squirrels doing the dirty work - but I’m not certain. It might be worth having a look around the area - you might just find one or both. I know, positive thinking - but what else have we got ? Best of luck !

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    1. I'd feel so much better if it knew it was squirrels. We sure have plenty of them around. But one agave was too large to easily be (re)moved by a squirrel. I'll keep my eyes open. Maybe I'll find clues...

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  16. This is shocking and sad. Yes, thieves are scum, but to think this was someone knowledgeable about plants, maybe an actual plant-person who could stoop sow low... I always felt plant people are better than that... what a blow.
    Being "mad as a three-legged dog trying to bury a turd on an icy pond" is a good way to describe the feeling.
    Chavli

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    1. It's not the loss of the plants that got to me, it's the loss of trust in people...

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  17. I've had Christmas lights stolen, in supposedly nice, safe neighborhoods in two states. Have you considered planting poison ivy or poison oak? (Am saying this tongue in cheek.)

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  18. That’s a huge bummer! I guess it’s time to start planting airtags in the rootball.

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    1. I've read about really valuable plants (esp. cycads) being implanted with the kind of microchips used in pets!

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  19. Taking care of a couple of public gardens- at a high school and a junior college, I'm familiar with that sinking feeling of violation when this happens. If it helps, I find the thief will rarely hit more than twice. I just replant with something completely different in the hopes it won't be something as appealing. I think some botanical gardens place giant "hair pins" through the rootball when installing their plants to make it harder to quickly pop the plants out of the ground. You could try googling to see if you can find a source for those.

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    1. Sue, I know you've had thefts on a far larger scale. Good to know that it probably was a one-off. Will look for more info on those "hair pins."

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  20. I feel your pain. I’m a volunteer gardener at a church in Greeley, Colorado. The church property covers a half city block so there is always a lot of work to do. I can’t tell you how many plants I’ve had stolen over the past 5 years. So devistating to spend time, energy and money to make a beautiful spot for people to enjoy only to have people take advantage of it. There’s also the trash they leave and the things they break, and… Sometimes the damage is from wildlife (or the crew that mows the lawns), but not always. I can get so frustrated that I want to quit. And then someone tells me how much they enjoy the gardens and thanks me for all my hard work. That helps a lot. Hang in there.

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    1. Sorry to hear about your ongoing troubles. Kudos to you for persevering.

      “ I can get so frustrated that I want to quit. And then someone tells me how much they enjoy the gardens and thanks me for all my hard work:”

      Yes!!! That's me in a nutshell :-)

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  21. Just awful. As another commenter said, a violation of your space and all the work you put into your plants. Gardens are very personal--part of the family, part of yourself. So sorry to see that. Security cameras a good idea.

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    1. You're right. I guess that's why it was such a jolt. I guess I was being a bit naive, never thinking this could/would happen here.

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  22. I am sorry for the spam alert! Now that you confirmed that it was not, I've read it:
    So sorry for your precious agaves :-( I know very well the feeling of loosing faith in humanity but please do not; no need to get bitter because of an idiot who has no self respect nor dignity obviously. You are a 'great succulent and more' gardener and a blogger and we love reading your blog and enjoy beautiful photos of yours. If we were not continents apart I would give you some other agave pups from my humble collection of agaves. Hang on there please !

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  23. I missed this post until today Jan. 25th. First, I am so sorry, Gerhard. I would install the lights and camera, but I would not plant anything valuable and enticing out in front, no matter what the deterrents. It is just the way the world is now unfortunately. It was obviously a targeted theft and, if thieves want it, they will figure out a way to get it somehow. Sad, but true.

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    1. The big issue I have is that this planting strip is the warmest spot in the entire garden and plants absolutely thrive there. But you're right, it's not the place for "collector plants."

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  24. I am sorry to hear about this, only seeing this post now. I am your neighbor that got some of your lovely Bearss limes recently. I can't figure out how to change my comment from anonymous. This is Gayna Lamb-Bang

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  25. We are in Seattle. Someone came into our yard and took all of our well established herb plants. What they could not pull up, they cut off at the ground. They took about 15 feet of garden. They did not like the old scraggly rosemary, so they left that. Hyssop, rosemary, lillies, succulents, other flowers are all gone. They were not finished and took ferns and landscape rocks. Items had been there for many years. It was a frustrating discovery. We remember many years ago our parents spent the day planting rhodies in the yard. They got up the next morning and they were all gone. We don't intend to replant so plants can be stolen again. We are so sorry to hear this happened to you and this is really happening across the United States. We just do not understand why people do this. They also came back for second helpings as yard tools were found one morning. They must have been scared off as all the neighbors are on alert. One neighbor suggested putting in a motion detector sprinkler to get them wet as thieves around here do not seem to care if they are on camera.

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  26. Your hostile language, and that of most respondents, is what is making your nation so divisive. Yes people shouldn't steal plants but I suggest it was taken by a fellow succulent lover like yourself, who is probably looking after it and perhaps even propagating from it, rather than 'pond scum'. It is interesting that you define yourself as a 'good person' which assumes you have divided your world up into good people, like yourself and bad people that you need to protect your smug little world from with CCTV etc. Little spirt of generosity for wider humanity being shown here. To state the obvious - we are all in it together - a bit of give and take and empathy make the trip easier for all and sweating the small stuff will only cause unnecessary stress.

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    1. Thank you for noting that generosity, empathy, and understanding are things to be valued.

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